33 weeks...

I know I say this is darn near every post, but this pregnancy really is flying by! Only about 7 weeks left to go - it's just crazy to think of. I've got probably about 5 weeks left of work - it's really time for me to start making up actual lists of my responsibilities, figuring out who will be handling what, and doing everything I need to do to make sure my maternity leave pay will come in a timely manner. It's winding down, that's for sure. I just put out the December schedule at work, and realized that more than likely, it ends on my last day (January 5th). I'm still up in the air about taking 2 weeks before my due date or just 1, but with every passing day, and how tired I get, I'm thinking that if I can make it through the holidays, that will be enough for me in terms of work.

Now while work feels like a big thing, I know that really it isn't - we really need to finish preparing for this baby's arrival! At this point the nursery is painted - we still need to clean the floor, get the furniture in and start moving baby's stuff in. After tomorrow, baby will have much more stuff, that's for sure. Kirsten (along with assorted family members) are throwing me a shower. There will be about 30 people there - I think it will be fun. One person that won't be there that makes me sad is Annie. I know that we're not super close - it's hard to be when there's a 14 year age difference, and a strained relationship with the parents. But at the end of the day, she's still my sister and always will be. I may have issues with Kathy, and if she didn't want to come, fine. But Annie is still my sister, and I know that her not driving and living an hour away makes getting someplace without a parent nearly impossible. But my feelings are still incredibly hurt that she'll be missing this day in my life. It may not seem a huge deal to some, but it is to me. What's worst is that for as long as I can remember, I've gotten a ration of sh*t from Dad and Kathy about being a good sister to Annie. Well I've decided that should they EVER pull that line with me again, well, let's just say my reply will be something my child will have to put the Old School earmuffs on for.

Kirsten almost didn't want to tell me, but I'm glad she did. This way I can be mad about it today, get my feelings out here, and get it out. I don't want these hurt feelings to ruin what I'm sure will be a great day. I need to focus on the people who do love Todd and I enough to join me (as Todd will be working) and celebrate the coming of our baby. I've said before that even though it hurs not being as close to Dad as I'd like, I know that my children will not lack for grandparents who love them, and will be an active part of their lives. Look at Kirsten's girls - those kids have more people they call Grammy and Grampy than they know what to do with!

Well enough of my sad rant - happy thoughts. I can't WAIT for the shower tomorrow. Alex was telling me how she thinks my special baby party will be lots of fun. When I left their house last night I got my usual hugs and kisses (well, except from Viktoria, but she'd just woken from a nap and was a cranky pants), and then Alex gave my belly a second hug. I can't wait for these girls to meet their new cousin. As hard as it was at times for me to see Kirsten have her girls, every day I am thankful to have them, and know that my own kids will be blessed to have such fun cousins in their lives!

I think I'm getting kicked for breakfast now...I'll write about the shower in a few days!

Heather